I'm a Lil' Bit Country

We all have one.  That one reality show that we would never admit that we watch, but would never miss an episode.  For me, that show started it's 4th season just a couple of weeks ago.

 

As a life long Dallas Cowboys fan, I've cheered for them when they've won Superbowls (all 5 of them) and I've stood by their side (and shed a few tears) when their 1989 season record was 1-15 (at least we beat the Washington Redskins!). And of course, as a teenager with my white shorts and vest, I had big dreams of being a Dallas Cowboy's Cheerleader.

Imagine my surprise when I'm flipping channels a couple of years ago and came across a reality show called: Making the Team where they were selecting Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders for the upcoming football season. As I watched, and seriously pondered, just how small a pair of shorts could get (those shorts are TINY), I began to understand the process for making the squad.

Now, I have to admit, I was thinking - how hard could it be? You do a few dance moves, swing your hair around, and perfect the ability to smile for hours while wearing boots and the job is yours. WRONG!

Let me tell you the steps it takes to make the squad and how some of these women prepare for auditions:

• They recommend you take their dance prep classes BEFORE auditions begin. Sometimes for a year!
• Preliminary auditions are first, sometimes with over 1,000 showing up.
• If you make the first cut, you'll go to semi-final auditions where you'll learn a routine and that famous kickline.
• Made it to final auditions?  Great, now it's time for your interview with football and current event questions.
• Made it through finals? That only means you're invited to training camp.

Training camp is 90 days.  Yes - that's 3 months - and guess what?  That's no guarantee that you'll make the squad.

Now, here's my question to you.  If this is the work, commitment, dedication and effort it takes to make a cheerleading squad - shouldn't it take AT LEAST that much work, commitment, dedication and effort to get what you say you want?

One of the things that has gotten lost in this microwave society we live in is good ol' fashion hard work:

Blood. Sweat. Tears. Commitmemt (some of these women audition year after year - and never make it).

So, I want to take this moment to remind you that anything worth having takes hard work, commitment, dedication and effort. How else will you:

• Get that promotion
• Earn that degree
• Fix that relationship
• Get healthy
• Start and build a successful business
• Raise a family
• Make the cheerleading squad

One last thing...I LOVE the theme song from Making the Team. It challenges you to decide how bad you want what you say you want. It's courtesy of country music star Tim McGraw. Think about what it is you say you want and then ask yourself the words from his song:

Are you hungry?
Are you thirsty?
Is it a fire that burns you up inside?
How bad do you want it?
How bad do you need it?
Are you eating, sleeping, dreaming
With that one thing on your mind?
How bad do you want it?
How bad do you need it?
Cause if you want it all
You've got to lay it all out on the line

I especially love the last line - it speaks to whatever you want to accomplish - "You've got to lay it all on the line".

Oh yeah, I'll be heading to that incredible billion dollar stadium on November 22nd.  I'll be in the stands to cheer my team on as they beat the Washington Redskins. 

2009 DCC Training Camp Candidates

Go Cowboys!

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Doreen Rainey is a Life Coach and Speaker who helps her clients Get RADICAL! For a FREE 30 day membership to RadicalLifestyle.com or to subscribe to her bi-weekly newsletter, visit her website. Join Doreen in the Washington, DC area for the 2010 Get RADICAL Women's Conference featuring Jillian Michaels, Fitness Trainer from The Biggest Loser and Rhonda Britten, Emmy Winner Life Coach from Starting Over and Celebrity Fit Club.

Childhood Dream...Adult Reality

Every now and then, I think back to my childhood dreams. What did I want to be when I grew up? Did I come close to living those dreams?

It's funny how childhood dreams fall away as they give way to adult reality.

However, every now and then, I revisit those childhood dreams...I go back to a time when I believed anything was possible. Well, today was one of those days. I decided to take a walk down memory lane. And guess what? I'm taking you with me - but you have to promise you won't laugh!

Childhood Dream: I had plans of being a concert pianist. I took piano lessons for at least 5 years and participated in several competitions. Adult Reality: While I can still read music and play a few notes of Beethoven's Fur Elise, I haven't had a piano in the house in years.

Childhood Dream: Explore the great outdoors and get out of the city life. Having grown up in the Washington, DC metro area, I thought how great it would be to live in the country. Not be a part of the rat race, city streets, and rush hour traffic. Adult Reality: I live in the suburbs and at times it drives me crazy. I love New York and wouldn't mind living there one day. But I still love nature. This is me and my mom riding the rapids in West Virginia.

Childhood Dream: Being a supermodel and hitting the runways in Milan, Paris, and New York (check out my fierce pose below!) Adult Reality: I still love designer clothes and bags (please note that loving and having are two different things!) But Ford Models, Elite Models, and Casablanca's has yet to ring my phone!

Childhood Dream: To not only be a member of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders squad, but to be a part of the show group - the select group of cheerleaders that gets to make all the appearances, singing and dancing their little hearts out. Adult Reality: It's still possible! I won't make it to this year's audition next month, but there's always 2010. Keep hope alive!

Childhood Dream: To grow up and party all the time. Be a socialite without a care in the world - the Paris Hilton of my generation. Didn't know where the money would come from...it would just be there. As you can see, I had the party thing down from an early age! Adult Reality: College, work, bills, grad school, marriage. Need I go on?

Childhood Dream: To wear a crown. Miss Virginia Teen. Miss Teen USA. There was something about the sash, the crown, the talent competition, the opening numbers and the interview with the judges. It was nerve racking but I completely enjoyed it. Check out my photos from the talent competition, the evening gown competition, and getting ready for my big group song and dance routine! Adult Reality: I have yet to win a crown and I'm still a little salty about it! :-)

So what about your childhood dreams? Have you visited them lately?

Some of them, we naturally outgrow, however, there are still those that linger - like making the cheerleader squad or winning a crown. Perhaps it's time to dust off some of your dreams! You may have to readjust them a little...but don't give up. Your childhood dream could still become your adult reality!

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Doreen Rainey is a Life Coach and Speaker who helps her clients Get RADICAL! For a FREE 30 day membership to the RADICAL Lifestyle Women's Network or to subscribe to her bi-weekly newsletter, visit her website. Join Doreen in the Washington, DC area for the 2010 Get RADICAL Women's Conference featuring Jillian Michaels, Fitness Trainer from The Biggest Loser and Rhonda Britten, Emmy Winner Life Coach from Starting Over and Celebrity Fit Club.

Why Talent is NEVER Enough

As I watched the Dallas Cowboys get their you-know-what kicked today, the only thing that made it somewhat palatable was the fact that I was watching them lose while on vacation - in Aruba. But the gentle Caribbean breeze, the swaying palm trees, and the clear, blue ocean could only do so much to ease the pain. How could a team with so much talent perform so badly?

Professional sports is no different from any other industry. Just because the talent is there, it doesn't guarantee that success will follow - as the Cowboys so convincingly demonstrated today. With all that skill, what else could they possibly need to ensure success?

As a life coach, I work with talented people all the time who have not been able to reach their professional goals. So, the question becomes - why?

I think there are a few additional ingredients you need to add to your talent and skill to increase your chances of victory. These include commitment, passion, the willingness to work, synergy, and a continued effort to develop.

Commitment - the ability to stay the course when times are difficult and obstacles come your way.

Passion - an unyielding, powerful, compelling feeling that drives you to relentlessly pursue your goals.

Willingness to work - goals, hopes and dreams are great, but if you aren't willing to put in the sweat equity, you can forget it. It's called work for a reason.

Synergy - cooperation, working together for a common purpose or benefit. You can never achieve success without the help of others. If you are team of one - you will lose.

Continue to develop - even Tiger Woods has a coach. The minute you think you have nothing else to learn is the minute you lose. Get a mentor, coach, or hey, just listen to your boss every now and then.

So what was the problem with the Cowboys? How could they get stomped 44-6 against the Eagles? I'm sure ESPN will tackle this question over and over and over and over...well, you get the picture. But my personal opinion? No passion. No synergy. And that will put in the loss column every time.

Week 16 - Who Controls Your Destiny?

It's week 16 in the NFL. Crunch time. Various teams are not only playing to win a spot in the post-season, they are watching other games, figuring out which teams have to win or lose to help their chance of getting in. For example, check out this scenario (see if you can keep up!)

The Vikings fumbled seven times against the Atlanta Falcons, losing four. Those turnovers, along with a host of other mistakes, did them in and left Minnesota hoping for a Green Bay victory over Chicago Monday night. Should the Bears win that game, the Vikings would need either to beat the New York Giants in their regular-season finale or hope for a Bears loss the same day at Houston.

On a more personal note, I had the unfortunate experience of watching my Dallas Cowboys lose to the Baltimore Ravens last night, relinquishing control of their playoff destiny. Not only were they no longer in control of whether they would see post-season play, they had to depend on the Washington Redskins to win to help them out.

Now, for anyone who knows anything about sports rivalries, there is no love lost between the Cowboys and Redskins, and while I secretly hoped the Redskins would win, I couldn't root for them. But here we are, week 16, hoping the Eagles would lose to the Skins. We had put ourselves in a position where we were depending on someone else to deliver our victory.

What about you? Have you placed your destiny in the hands of someone else? If you're not sure, ask yourself a couple of questions. Do you say things like:

• If he or she was more supportive I could...
• If my boss would do more to help/encourage/train me I could...
• If I had more time I would...
• If that wouldn't have happened last year, five years ago, ten years ago, things would be different now.

If you're guilty of any of these, or something like it, it's time to take back control of your destiny. Who has control over your finances - your career - your relationships? If you think it's anyone but you, you've relinquished control!

Don't live your life sitting on the sidelines, watching as others control your destiny. Get in the game, call your own plays, and take responsibility for your success. After all, that's the only way to guarantee your victory.